The words don’t add up to nuthin

There are infinite iterations of nonsense. Take all the words in all the languages and place a “!” (Factorial sign) after the list and you have shown a representation of every possible combination of words into phrases. (Not really, but close enough to the mathematical exercise for calculating possible combinations of numbers that it can illustrate my point)

Over the past ten years Ive read countless biblical derivations all of which served to get people where they wanted to go in their interpretations. No where is this more prevalent than in the way preachers and evangelical feminists choke out statements about submission.

They are settled on wrong marriage narratives that use flawed exegesis. Now, what about the folksy sounding wisdom nuggets that preachers use as paraphrase for bible teaching? All major bible themes need these American cliches to better communicate Christian truths. Right? “Its not religion its a relationship”… that.

I came across a new one today from Jimmy Evans in his Marriage Builder Weekly email. he is talking about power and dominance in marriage. He fakes a very high risky high potential reward pass into hellish defense:

Research indicates that the healthiest home environments are where males lead the household

The play was a ruse. He meant to throw the ball straight out of bounds and stop the clock buying his team to muster something better for the next play. The white board that the play was written on what smudged. It really looked like this with the smudged words replaced:

Research indicates that the healthiest home environments are where males lead the household—he initiates the well-being of the home

Can anyone tell me what that even means?

Well being :   the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy

Can that be initiated? Does it even matter? Or is it not just more gobbledegook that allows a man to speak on headship and hot have his head handed to him by his angry wife?

I’m initiating abruptly ending this post.

8 thoughts on “The words don’t add up to nuthin

  1. Can anyone tell me what that even means?

    Beats me.

    Well being : the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy

    I suppose one can initiate a degree of health for those under one’s charge. Long term, this can contribute to comfort and happiness. It takes a certain amount of maturity for the subordinate to be happy about this in the immediate.

    I had a funny conversation with an elder of our church yesterday. His wife and he had given me conflicting instructions concerning something we were working on so I asked him what he wanted me to do. His response:

    “You just do whatever makes her happy. Never mind that it’s obvious I only do that about half the time. Me and you have a different mission”.

    He laughed, which made me laugh, and she thought we should be working instead of laughing.

    It’s all relative without an objective standard, but objective, unambiguous standards would put professional marriage ministries out of business.

  2. He’s responsible for it. Man up and make everyone happy. Even those people who won’t rejoice in the Lord always, refuse to be content and stake their future happiness on grinding their axe of discontentment as a means to getting everything that they want.

    I will suggest that as a leader being content is a good first step. It help tamp down the drama and the fitness testing and provides a positive model. On the other hand, it doesn’t make him a failure if they don’t follow his example like this bozo seems to indicate.

  3. Research indicates that the healthiest home environments are where males lead the household


    This goes without saying, and should be assumed that the steps of everyone under that roof are ordered by the Lord.

    he initiates the well-being of the home

    … by creating an environment where it’s expected that the steps of everyone under that roof are ordered by the Lord.

    To Jimmy Evans:

    Proverbs 16:20 – He who heeds the word wisely will find good, and whoever trusts in the Lord, happy is he.

    There’s your contentment right there.  Everybody in the house heeds the Word and trusts in Him, and we gonna get along…if not, then sorry about yer luck, bud.

    One cannot preemptively vet your future family.  Oh…if only we could!


  4. He’s responsible for people in the family being happy and content.

    Pity the poor fool saddled with that Sisyphean task.

  5. Research indicates that the healthiest home environments are where males lead the household—he initiates the well-being of the home

    Looks like something from a managerial consultant. Can’t just come out and say something plainly the way others have, but rather wrap plain truth up in fuzzy words with enough ambiguity that all customers can hear it as they want to hear it. This enables managerial consultants to peddle the same stuff repeatedly, by the way.

    Let’s all remember what the client base for “marriage experts” tends to look like. My guess is it’s “women over 35 who are somehow not haaaapy”. Empath is an exception, for the same reason that some other men are exceptions: when men see a problem, they turn to a reference book or a manual or a website to find a fix for the problem. Sure, we may get angry and roll around in that for a while, but the motivation is fix the problem, not search for validation, again in my opinion.

    I bet that the marriage-helper lists Empath is on are 80+% female. I could be wrong, but I don’t think so.

    Elspeth’s church elder:
    “You just do whatever makes her happy.

    Yeah, that’ll work. Because women never change their minds on a dime about what would make them happy, nossirree. Sad for him to be on that treadmill, for sure.

  6. AR, I’m only one three mailing lists mainly for blog fodder. Family Life, This guy Jimmy Evans, and FoTF.
    Dont get me started on management consultants. Ive contended for over 15 years (that’s when I realized) that there have only been one or two management self help books ever written. Then they were rewritten a lot of times.
    Those guys are bizarre, and either clever or frightening true believers. When back in the early 90’s I saw men I worked alongside, even smarter ones who had an original thought or two….not so common in multi billion multi national oil companies like i was in back then….breathlessly whispering the word “change” with a look of wonder on their faces, it was almost as strong a signal for the end of days as when a couple years ago I started seeing gluten free beer.

    fast forward, now CHANGE is a C level job in those large companies. CCO. Un flipping believable, and the men I saw transfixed had simply read the book, then been exposed to a guru about the wildly popular “Who Moved My Cheese”

    I toyed with some scribbling on the topic back then. I bought a dozen or so of the then current management books (including the most over rated puffed up of them all Jack Welch) and read them, My intention was to write something, an article, a book…. with an anti-cliche title like “Get Back In The Box” (recall this was late 90’s so that outside the box stuff was still de rigueur) Never got around to it beyond reading all that crap.

    Hope sprung when Jim Collins wrote “Good to Great” around that time. I emailed him and he and I bantered for a few months about this stuff. He seemed the only person to have actually written something tangible and new. And he shared the view you and I are mentioning here.

  7. Empath, in all cases it is something to sell to the widest possible audience.
    Maybe I’m cynical, but that is how I see it.

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