Duct Tape Dynasty

Arrrrrgh! Since the Phil Robertson “controversy” my wife has started watching “Duck Dynasty”, we haven’t had a television for over a year since I cannot stand watching it for more than 5 minutes so I have been watching it over her shoulder on her tablet. Apparently, growing a beard, wearing camouflage and acting like a red-neck is the new standard of masculinity. Taking up the reigns from the like’s of the Cable Guy, “The Red Green Show” and Tim Allen’s “Home Improvement” these guys lampoon masculinity for fun and profit. The formula is well established at this point. (Haha, look at the clown with the beard, or put another way, the “Duct Tape Dynasty” of ridiculing masculinity).

Recently I was watching feminist culture critic Anita Sarkeesian whine about the Bechdel test while she applied it to the Academy Awards. The test is intended to show that women aren’t making a significant dent in our culture. The test has three rules:

*The movie must have two female characters.
*They must have a conversation.
*About something other than a man.

I watch Anita Sarkeesian for comic relief and would note that not one single video of hers on YouTube would pass the Bechdel test. Sometimes I wonder if you took the average feminist day and applied the Bechdel test to it if they would “pass”. I doubt it, every conversation that they have with fellow feminists must be strewn with words like “rape culture” and “patriarchy”, so blaaaat, FAIL.

I’m wondering if we could start applying a test that would help us register the impact of the “patriarchy”. Call it the “True Patriarch” test, in keeping with the Bechdel test we’ll have three rules.

*The media must have a man that put’s God first.
*He must be respected by his family and/or show narrator.
*While having a sense of humor he maintains his dignity.

Now, go forth and see if you can find a man like that in the media. (I for one have all but given up, although I would say after all of my bellyaching that Phil Robertson probably passes the test). Also note by doing this that while the feminists are filling the bandwidth moaning about “the patriarchy” that it can scarcely be found. Maybe it’s time to break out the classic movies?

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9 thoughts on “Duct Tape Dynasty

  1. The classics.

    Feminists could not have built a guided missile better than the one that was created when one single feature was added to movies. After EPL, Fireproof and Courageous, and dropping back a decade or two, Truth about Cats and Dogs, etc., the change that first manifested in 1913 was given a name that I had to update…….the talk talk talk talk talk talkies.

    Ive learned to walk with one bowed leg, swinging my arm in a circle like Chaplain did, and never had to hear a single female talk talk talking from the box with a screen.

  2. I have been watching a lot of movies lately and I don’t think any would have passed Anita’s test.
    Gettysburg certainly wouldn’t.

  3. Perhaps we could see if female directors (or producers, for that matter) have a better record than male directors. I would wager not by a wide margin, if any.

  4. Even chick flicks have a hard time clearing Anita’s bar since many of them are rom-coms.

    A pure reversal of the Bechdel test might have been:

    *A man
    *Doing something, not for or because of a woman
    *Not acting as if he’s a disposable sanitary wipe.

    Good luck finding that movie.

  5. Pingback: Is Phil Robertson a Modern Day John the Baptist? | INCOMING!!!

  6. Moved my blog back to google. You can still access it through my gravatar if the servers have caught up. Comments were imported too….My most recent post addresses the topic of Phil Robertson rising to the national scene. I linked back to this post since it inspired a re-post. Check’er out at let me know what you think. 🙂

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