Sphere bloggers, this one included, are often accused, in written comments, of hating women. If we pontificate in real life similar to how we do behind our screen names then we hear these accusations spoken as well. It’s the lowest and cheapest rebuke we get from women (and some men) who point to no evidence of having found an inaccuracy, but bow up in writing or in person perhaps expressly because they found no inaccuracies. This is not to say there are no inaccuracies, only that they are not predominant and are usually wrapped in much truth. Truth can hurt. Truth can anger.
Almost all men have had some injury at the hand of a woman. (Just as almost all women have conversely had some injury at the hands of a man. By injury I do not mean only physical.) Even in the evangelical feminist church seminar 33, The Series, there was a section about the lasting pain from what mothers may have done during boyhood. They acknowledged this, albeit in a way that precluded any real culpability for the women involved because the love that motivated them necessarily mitigates whatever harm came from them in the form of smothering.
I confess that I can be relentless as I look for the feminism, especially evangelical feminism, in daily life. In doing so it leaves little doubt in the minds of those close enough to me to know how consistent I am about it, that I believe this is an undiscovered problem in the main and it is destroying Christianity, unchecked, from the inside out. It is not hatred, therefore, but it is doggedness. And if doggedness is indicative of hatred, I offer the churches drum beat on homosexuality and its related matters like same sex marriage as compelling evidence that the church is a hate movement. But the church is not, in general, hateful. It is dogged.
As a motive, if there has been a deep sustained wound to a man, so mortal as to cause a pathological reaction that will not relent, then perhaps hatred is a factor. It can be, however, pathological yet not hateful. This may be irrational, but again, it is not hate. Another reaction to being wounded can be an Asperger-like obsession with the issues we bandy around in the sphere. And finally, it is possible for the badly or mildly wounded or even the unwounded to simply see the red pill truth and experience a sort of calling to right a wrong. In other words, God is involved. I am not sure if I could adequately express my own motives for staying on a topic for the past ten years and not tiring of it or growing discouraged enough to walk away.
The engaged, which bloggers are a part of, consists of people who are wounded, obsessive, called, or all of the above, hence they are the best equipped to be the engaged.
The problem with calling us hateful is that it is to look away dismissively because what we say is not at all congruent with conventional wisdom, which is like being in a lazy comfy chair. That’s why few men fall into the category of those who see the injustice without having experienced it.
The irony is, we would not say that evangelical feminist women (or men) hate men. No. They just lazily think men are at fault for everything from sexual moral decay to static electricity in wool pants. Women in particular have bought the idea that they have special virtues. One such virtue would seem to be empathy. I have a post in the queue about that. Its one I am taking my time in writing.
The fact is that instead of looking at men, ascribing characteristics to us that let you stay in the comfy thought chair, and then setting up human mechanisms to keep men dancing to the play list women select, how about we realize we owe everything, both and all of us, to a bloody lamb that cleaned us up. Yes, men were in there too. It is not hatred therefore that we are tired of being expected to live like Pharisees while women bask in grace.