Well, they put their money where their mouth is anyway

We talk a lot about the admonition to “man up and marry the sluts”. Could it be? Did I read an article that told the story of a pastor and his wife offering up their son as the recommended rescuer for the teen single mother they had been ministering to?

I was trouble. I only went to church on rare occasions. I didn’t like going because being there made me feel guilty. Guilty about sleeping with my boyfriend. Guilty about drinking on the weekends. And guilty for swearing like a sailor when I wasn’t within earshot of an adult.

To my credit, I was lost and looking for love in all the wrong places. “Trouble” really got herself into trouble when she found herself pregnant at age 17.

She got herself turned around:

When I accepted Jesus’ forgiveness, the guilt was gone, I went to church, and I worshiped God.

I also prayed for God to bring me a godly husband someday. I didn’t know who would want to get involved with a single mom, but I dared to hope.

And her prayers for a husband and father for her boy were answered:

When Cory was born, John (the pastor’s son) reached out to me as a friend. I liked him. He was sweet … and then our mothers started playing matchmaker.

Yes, you’ve got that right: The same woman who told John that I was trouble was now encouraging him to ask me out. Why? She saw God’s transforming work in me, and she dared to hope, too.

Fast-forward through a very lovely dating relationship, and John and I married when my son Cory was just 9 months old. (John officially adopted him a few years later.) God answered my prayer.

She hopes to one day be able to be a mother in law like the one that found her husband for her:

I’m hoping to be a mother-in-law just like Darlyne. I know now what a beautiful mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship looks like. And I also know how prayer makes all the difference.

This situation may or may not be a perfect example of redemption. I have no idea. But it definitely serves to encourage the mantra that we hear from the Driscolls of the world. It would be best, in my opinion, that Family Life not publish this stuff as some form of encouragement.

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14 thoughts on “Well, they put their money where their mouth is anyway

  1. A couple of thoughts.

    First, she was young when she turned herself around. A very different story than a woman in her mid to late twenties. Or even older.

    Second, she might have had a N of only 1 before she got married, which is a far cry from most Prodigal Daughters.

    Third, you are absolutely right that this sends the wrong message, on many different levels. Telling women that some good God-fearing man will swoop them up and marry them after they have returned to the Church after living a life of sin will only encourage them to life that sinful life. Truth be told, some men might be willing to take the risk this preacher’s son did. But for the love of all that is sacred, we should never give women the idea that this too can happen to them.

  2. But for the love of all that is sacred, we should never give women the idea that this too can happen to them.

    I agree. The truth of the matter is that it happens more than we care to admit. Young churched women marry unbelieving men and live happily ever after (*cough ahem cough*). But I don’t want my daughters to do it.

    Single mothers land godly husbands and live semi-happily ever after. But I don’t want my daughters to do that either.

    These people need to be careful of the messages they send. I don’t think they realize what they’re doing here.

  3. The way plain scripture can be twisted, would we not expect this to be seen as a happily ever after tale of, dont worry, go get your tingles, then pray and confess and you too will find a good man, maybe even a really cool preachers son!

  4. I agree fully with you and Donal, Empath. You misunderstand me. I was simply noting that redemption stories do happen.

  5. Regarding Redemption stories… they are only appropriate if the woman sets out with this NOT in mind. A woman who thinks she can pull of this “prodigal daughter gets it all” act is committing the sin of presumption.

  6. “I don’t think they realize what they’re doing here.”

    Nice, Elspeth. Nice. Understatement of the day.

  7. Donalgrahme:
    Absolutely right. All this does is to reinforce the idea that women can ride the Cock Carousel with scumbags in the confidence that some responsible guy (I mean, a sucker) will man up and take responsibility for her later on. And BTW, how do these jokers at Family Life know this story is going to have a happy ending?

    In my own pre-Red Pills, I’ve lost count of how many women assured me that they’d ‘prayed for a man just like you’. Pffft. Where are they now? Back slutting around with losers, of course.

    Man-hating, thug-chasing, self-centered bitches—-all of ’em!

  8. So, the saving power of Christ’s redemption is now justification for sexual license? Sounds like whitewashing a building with broken windows and rusty plumping. Yes, it is good that the young woman found Christ, repented, and sought to live right. However, it is those who stayed chaste before marriage and had children within marriage whose stories are so often overlooked (and I would say deliberately ignored).

    Do women have to live in debauchery before God will save them? Is a woman who lives a chaste life, lives wisely, and is productive and responsible somehow less a sinner and less a saint? Does Christ care only for the foolish and self-destructive?

    Well, maybe I should stop trying to live a wise and holy life. Maybe it is time for some drink, drugs, and f*ck buddies. When I’ve developed an addiction, landed in prison, sired bastard children, and am crying out because life is horrible, then will Jesus really love me and come to me. Because from what I understand, the moment I try to live wise and right is the moment Jesus will abandon me as a Pharisee.

    Right. Got it.

  9. When I’ve developed an addiction, landed in prison, sired bastard children, and am crying out because life is horrible, then will Jesus really love me and come to me

    Maybe if you were gay you would have a chance of getting a churchian position on all that that favored you. As a hetero male, not so much

  10. Miserman:
    And not only will addiction, a prison record, bastard children, and incessant whining make you a good Christian these days; it will also turn you into a chick magnet! But as a hetero male, ‘not so much’ there either.

  11. I understand the point to what you guys are saying here, but the theology is getting a little shaky. Maybe the words of Jesus are in order:

    Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little. Luke 7:47

    Being a “chief sinner” doesn’t make you a good Christian. However, for the truly repentant, there is a heightened level of gratitude for Christ’s gift of redemption and salvation.

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