Pizza the Hut Ate Himself to Death

Its going to be tough, but I will make that title fit this piece. I have wanted to use that for years, and maybe I was gifted the opportunity.200px-Pizzahutt You have to like Spaceballs, if you don’t, I am truly sorry. I need to now go back and watch it and figure out which character is the abuser, what with all the mention of Schwartzes there’s gotta be an abuser in there somewhere. Why? Answer this question: What do Edward Cullen, Christian Grey, and Steve the cowboy have in common?

Answer: They were highly sought after romantic protagonists in stories, factual or fiction, and attracted millions of women seeking similar vicarious experiences They are abusers.

And Pizza the hut was made out of such damned good pizza he ate himself in his own limo. Make sense?

Remember when the network TV stations ran some version of Chiller Theater late on Saturday nights? It was the old Lon Chaney movies, werewolves, vampires, Frankenstein, etc. Towards the end of the genre, the later made movies, they started to mix the characters up, releasing Frankentein vs The Werewolf, and Swamp Thing meets Dracula and so forth.

Comes Edgar and Christian and Steve. Ossiana Tepfenhart has written an article that frames three contemporary and popular stories as how to manuals for spotting an abuser. She is of course referring to the Twilight movies, the 50 Shades of Grey book, and another book called The Feminist And The Cowboy.They are the monsters that are attacking these poor women.

That’s how I envision the writer portraying the protagonists from the stories she mentions. The similarities are eerie. In all those old black and white movies there was a woman who was romantically invested in one of the scary creatures, and in the end, one monster had to resist his base nature to defend the feinting woman from the attack of the other creature. The suddenly good monster often died after saving the damsel. But while he was alive, he was a beast. He may have even frightened her through her window and in more scandalous films, torn her bodice.

Edgar and Steve and Christian are abusers, kidnappers, takers, all the alpha dark traits tied up in one studly hot offensive misogynist nightmare.

swamp thing

But wait, scores of women are lining up to consume these products, some  admitting to being powerfully attracted to the imagery to the point of acting out. They are (gasp) chasing the bad boy. They are succumbing to hypergamy. And they are enjoying it.

Now Ms Tepfenhart comes along like the other monster from the black and white horror films, risking everything to save the innocent damsel. In this case, the other monster is a ghost.

Be it for a blog, a testimonial, or even ghostwriting. You name the topic, and I will use research and personal experience, or given materials to write it.

Maybe she had an abuse fantasy book queued up and ready, a book that would quiver the jello so to speak, and was beaten to it.

Quiz: How does Pizza the Hut fit into this? Answer: I’m not sure.

But it was fun using him in the title of a blog entry that shows how hypergamy and women’s vehement denial of same have them eating themselves alive in fits of cognitive dissonance. .

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10 thoughts on “Pizza the Hut Ate Himself to Death

  1. Pingback: Links #4 and Comments | The Society of Phineas

  2. Ah, ask and you shall receive:

    Pizza the Hut is devouring himself just like our culture/hypergamous women and especially Churchianity.

    It will end in nothing but vomit and excrement:

    “But they also have erred through wine, and through strong drink are out of the way; the priest and the prophet have erred through strong drink, they are swallowed up of wine, they are out of the way through strong drink; they err in vision, they stumble in judgment. For all tables are full of vomit and filthiness, so that there is no place clean. Whom shall he teach knowledge? and whom shall he make to understand doctrine? them that are weaned from the milk, and drawn from the breasts.”
    (Isa 28:7-9)

    Have cheery, lighthearted day!!!

  3. I frequently come up with the titles of my posts before the posts themselves. Titles are important. Well done.

  4. Hmmm. I see that Yahoo has blocked my email account due to “misuse.” This is an account I rarely use, and have only in the last months used to leave comments on Empathogical’s blog as well as Elusive Wapiti and Dalrock. Anyone else ever have this happen to them. Sorry if this is off-topic, but then again, in a way, it is not.

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