In my posts about Russell Moore (one parsing his Ephesians 5 derived message, and the other demonstrating the possible cumulative effect of the churchian experience on a young woman’s life) there is a contradiction between what we should expect, and what we are told. That flavor of contradiction is not limited to, nor has it originated from the church. The church is handily following the secular machinations on raising boys and girls.
I’d been provoked to write something about child raising based on reading a comment a woman left at Cane’s place. Lucky me, the venerable Family Circle has offered up a condensed illustration of the cultural frame that exists in America. This is a natural outcome of being steeped in the pedegogy Cane’s too clever by half commenter made.
Writer Salley Shannon writes in Family Circle, “Too Sexy Too Soon”. The title suggests a revisit of the Jon Bennet Ramsey tragedy, or in reality TV terms, Honey boo boo, both painful and disturbing for different reasons, but both for what they reflect of our culture. The opening paragraph confirms the topic.
Alaena Punzi is determined. She wants to shave her legs, wear makeup, and get her eyebrows waxed. Her fashion tastes tend toward miniskirts and trendy tees. None of this would be a terribly big deal — except that Alaena is only 10.
But why waste a perfect opportunity to go only partially into Moore’s area of examining problems with girl’s self esteem
One reason is in-your-face obvious: the omnipresent ads, television, music, and videos blasting a “you have to be sexy to be popular” message
when one can step fully into said circle and point back to boys?
1. Your son buys a T-shirt with a sexual image or message on it
He may be trying to impress his male peers and feel more macho.[ ] “Insecure boys are feeling they have to wear these slogans to prove their masculinity.”
2. Your tween daughter wants to shave her legs and tweeze her eyebrows
“Young teen girls are terribly self-critical,”
3. Your son downloads a sexually crude screen saver
“It’s about claiming that he belongs in Boy World.”[ ] Then talk with him about objectifying women — explain how sexy photos of women show that they have only one thing to offer, that they aren’t to be taken seriously. It would be great if his dad could have this discussion with him. [ dad may not, but it would be great]
4. Your tween daughter comes home from school wearing mascara, liner, the works
She’s trying to look older, like a big sister, a girl at school, or a teen star.
6. Lately when you go shopping, your daughter has been begging for low-rise jeans, thongs. and push-up bras
“From about fifth grade on, if you don’t have the right clothes, you’re scorned. And for kids in this age group, nothing is as important to psychological health as having friends.”[ ] “Have her show you pictures of clothes she likes,” says Wiseman. “Then compromise on the items you can live with and veto the ones you can’t.”
See the pattern? Girls and self esteem, boys and too much testosterone and of course, objectifying girls.
Family Circle and Moore have prescriptions and proscriptions that point in the same direction.