In the struggle for better understanding between genders, in the struggle to understand relationships, one thing that I feel is greatly missing is women’s acknowledgement of their own sex’s acts of evil. Men are an easy target; men are the majority of political leaders throughout history, the majority of criminal leaders, instigators of wars, etc etc. We all know this. Yet even though modern feminists sometimes acknowledge that women abuse, neglect or even murder children, they don’t really own any responsibility for this.
I recently watched a horror movie about a serial killer. In the movie the man was clearly abused as a child by his father in disturbing ways–and yet the movie does not absolve him of the responsibility for his adult actions. He has become a monster; we are not asked by the movie maker to sympathize with this adult man, what we see is a cause, not a justification.
Feminism fails humanity in that it does not make this connection. If feminism were making such a movie about a woman it would be one of those movies where the killer is really a demon called the Patriarchy. Because of this demon Patriarchy women themselves commit no evil acts. The utter necessity of a mother’s role in a child’s life has no bearing on how they were raised in and of itself–because the demon Patriarchy makes it impossible to judge their actions. If they were free of the demon Patriarchy they would be entirely pure.
This simply puts the onus on men to be subservient to feminism. Feminists do not even address women who abuse children or their spouses or others in their lives except as being victims of the Patriarchy.
We’ve all seen the model: women are strongly encouraged by feminists to feel that their chief sin is being a doormat, not loving their own hearts. In some cases this may be true, but in fact it is the ONLY acceptable scenario. It’s interesting that if you make a search on yahoo for “Abusive Women” there are one and a half pages on that subject overwhelming search hits for “abused women”. I stopped around page six.
I don’t think anyone in the general men’s movement denies that women get abused, or that it is wrong that it happens. Feminists, however, blame the Patriarchy for everything, and thus take no responsibility for their own actions towards others, nor do they encourage other women to do so.
An interesting example of this is found where feminists within the Church reexamine the story of Adam and Eve. They see blaming Eve as being terribly wrong and something that led to the abuse of women. The odd thing about this is that most theologies blame both Adam and Eve, and hold them equally guilty. Requiring, for example, women to submit themselves to their husbands because Eve sinned first isn’t saying that women need to be doormats–it means that women need to curb their desire to believe that all their feelings are valid in favour of doing good, because Eve put her own curiousity and desire before her relationship with God. On the other hand, Adam seems to have been rather passive during the whole thing, and therefore men are urged to be proactive, to seek to do good. These things are a mirror of one another, starting from different positions and seeking to be united in the same position.
I can understand why morality is rejected by feminism. First of all, it is an ideology with its roots in skepticism of the status quo. Fair enough. And the Church hardly has a pristine history. But we can’t rest at saying “the devil (or the Patriarchy) made me do it”. I don’t think anyone needs to respect them while they refuse to accept that women are responsible for the evils that they do.