Ive discovered that a woman who is in a marriage where some thing(s) her mate is doing make her sad, unhappy, angry, upset, depressed, feel bad, etc. is unaware that something is wrong. Only once she has read up on abuse and sees the exact things her husband is doing on one of these comprehensive abuse lists can she then know that something is wrong in their relationship.
These lists of things that are abuse are recruitment tools, for empathy in numbers, and for vicarious loathing of other men who are low down dirty filthy abusers. Once a women says she is being abused, every women who has ever made that claim feels again vindicated. Nevermind that in ones case the man was hoarding the remote control, or leaving feminine products off his shopping lists, these can be loosely associated with these miles wide abuse definitions, and another sister can be added to the roster. Then the gang of abuse claimers grows by one, and the empathy aura expands.
I hear NASA can see it from space.